New Stories

It's been a long time since I've blogged so I have lots of stories to tell. I love telling stories and my repertoire of good ones needed updated, so in the past week I've had lots of opportunities to update the good story file. So here they are.
Silly me, I signed up to participate in medical research. It sounded good, I was going to be paid to let them test my blood, do a few brain scans and answer some questions. Plus I was going to get to go on an all expenses paid trip to Pittsburg, where the reserch was taking place. So on Thursday I took off to Pittsuburg, anticipating a nice motel, with time to relax and catch up on reading. Things did not go as planned. Flights were late and so I arrived late. As soon as I got there I was rushed off for an MRI and other tests. I also found out that I would be sleeping in their sleep research lab. Talk about depressing. The room was a concrete box with a white bed, with white sterile sheets and a pillow covered in plastic. There were machines everwhere to monitor sleep and the temperture was set at 65 degrees. It was cold and sterile and nothing like the cozy motel I was picturing. The second day I was there I was suppossed to have a brain scan. I had an IV in one arm and an arterial line in the other. I was strapped to a bed and I had a plastic mask over my face to keep my head completely still. I was suppossed to lay there for two 90 minute sessions. Half way throught the first session the nurse started injecting radioactive solution into my veins so that it could be seen in the scan. After each injection my veins had to be flushed with alcohol. This was worst pain I had ever felt. I could feel it searing through all of my veins. With my head strapped down and my arms contected to IVs the only thing I could move were my legs. I was crying and try to hook my heels over the edge of the bed to get away from the pain. After three of these injections one of the nurses relized I was crying and stopped the procedure. She pulled me out of the scanner and told me I could quit. I felt like I was in a scary movie. It didn't even feel real.
After all that, I still had to wait till the next morning to fly out. I was told not to use either of my arms for anything or my arteries could burst. So I was left alone to fend for myself without the use of arms. Tons of fun. I couldn't even carry my luggage through the airport. I had two bags and I alternated kicking them through the airport. If things could get worse, my flight was canceled and I was chosen to be searched for a bomb. The whole trip was a bust. Never, Never, Never participate in medical research, you will be treated like a lab rat.
Shortly following story number one, story number two happened. I was at a youth conference in Witchita and I got a horrible bladder infection. I was writhing around in pain so Jadon took me to the emergency room. They confirmed that it was a bad infection and they gave me pain medication and antibiotics. I left thinking I would feel better soon. Not so, I took the pain medication and had a horrible reaction to it. I was violently sick. I threw up for hours and was so dehydrated that I had to go back to the emergency room. I spent another 5 hours there being pumped with fluids and medicine. Now I'm home and doing much better but it's ok with my if I never have to put on another hospital gown or roll up my sleeve so an IV can be put in. I've had my fare share of all that junk lately.
Now on to story #3. This one is a happy one. I was at work today and guess who walked in, Bill Clinton himself. The cacuses are today and so all the political people are in downtown Des Moines. Anyways, I couldn't believe my eyes. It was crazy to see him standing there in my store, ten feet away. He was surrounded by people and he never actually came up to the bar to ordered a drink. But he left with a drink so I'm sure someone else placed his order. Which means that I made his drink because I was making drinks at the time. So today I made an awesome cup of coffee for Bill Clinton. I never saw that coming. Oh, and in case you're wondering, Yes his nose looks just as big in real life.
Well that's all of my new stories and I kinda hope I don't get any more too soon, unless they're good ones. So with that. Happy New Year

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